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One of the larger issues in blended families, but not unique to blended families, is disciplinary differences. These are sometimes so substantial that marriages are dissolved due to "irreconcilable differences." Each person has a disciplinary or parenting style that has been established based on upbringing, moral beliefs, bias, and long before the blended family occurs. These deeply rooted ways are complex to change. Discussion before marriage is always a great place to start

There are times when we all get stagnant in life. We become comfortable and complacent with where we are. We may even feed ourselves lies that we can never change or that things will never improve. Unfortunately, these lies can become a reality if we give up. Complacency can become a horrible place to stay. Repeating the same old mistakes, arguments, and trials with no growth. I don't know about you but there are some trials in life that I never want to repeat. I cry out to G

The term retroactive jealousy was one that I had never used or heard until we started trying to blend our families. Oh yes, I had experienced it before just never to that level or degree nor had it ever lasted so long. I am not proud of my experience with retroactive jealousy and after discussion with my spouse, we realized that we both experienced it to differing degrees. Having realized that it affected both of us and way more in our blended marriage than previous relations

No one explains so many areas when embarking on a blended family adventure. It is almost like a fun adventure where everyone loads into the car only to discover that no one brought luggage, GPS, or even the keys! The first several months and even years can be completely overwhelming. Most researchers agree that it takes 5-7 years for a blended family to feel comfortable with each other and operate somewhat smoothly. That is a long time of turmoil! Do not lose heart! Your live

Holidays can be some of the most challenging times for blended families. Traditions can become complicated. You will want to create new traditions, and if your split from your ex was ugly, you may want to eradicate any old traditions. The children will struggle because the way that holidays were celebrated before will change, especially if they miss any old regular traditions that are discarded due to painful memories. New custody schedules also complicate holidays. The holid

Resentment is one of the most prevalent emotions in blended families, and it can crop up many times. Resentment occurs when we do not establish proper boundaries and feel misused or taken advantage of. Blended families are at a high risk for this because there are people outside of the marriage who seem to have control. I say, "They seem to have control" because you can either allow this or not. Discussion and communication with your spouse about how you feel and what you can

The word Honeymoon typically brings bright smiles, gleeful giggles, and love-struck eyes to mind. However, when this is a honeymoon with lots and lots and lots of baggage...er, I mean luggage....it can turn into Honey gloom. The second marriage, a blend of families, and a LOT of baggage. It's not your typical honeymoon scenario. First marriages are challenging enough, with their share of childhood scars and emotional issues. But when you add the weight of 'Been There, Done T

It's important to understand that step-parenting is not easy and that there is no way to fully prepare for it. No matter how many books you read or how many degrees you have, the range of emotions you can experience in a short time can be overwhelming. The constant cycle of guilt and joy can only be experienced, not taught.   It's also essential to acknowledge that step-parenting was never a part of God's original plan for families. It results from our imperfect world, and th

Ahhhh, Life. What is its meaning? So many authors and playwrights have pondered this question since the beginning of time. The problem is...

Struggles in life are inevitable, from minor to life-changing and overwhelming. God never promised a struggle-free life. When God clothed himself in the flesh and came to earth, He did not choose even for Himself to escape the struggles. Why would the God of everything, Creator and Master of the Universe, choose to struggle? This is so foreign to our minds. We want to escape the struggles; we beg to escape the struggles, and we want the inconvenience, confusion, or pain

Ever hear the old saying..."sick and tired of being sick and tired". How many can relate? Life tends to bring you down and make you feel...